Hi, it’s Dr. Denise Taylor on this beautiful, sunny day down in the wood, and I just want to ask you the question, who am I? Who are you? Often people define themselves, um, related to the work that they do or their role. You know, I’m a mum, I’m a daughter, I’m a wife, etcetera. But it’s like, but who are you really?
And it’s something that I talk about with my clients, and I think it’s really important that we know the person we are.
This is our personality style. These are the things that make us unique. This is what’s important to us. This is allowing me to be my full self, my authentic self.
Other people might want us to be something different. You might be in a relationship and the other person wants you to fit in with their ideal about what a person should be like, In the workplace, you might have to portray yourself as less creative than you really are. More outgoing than you really are. And it’s exhausting.
It’s truly exhausting to play a role, because really that’s what you are doing. You’re pretending to be somebody that you are not. You’re playing a role.
So, what I’d like you to do is to spend some time journaling maybe just thinking about it about, but who am I really?
When can I be my best self, my authentic self? Because life is easier when you can play yourself and you don’t have to act, and you can just be the person that you are.
Think about how are you most comfortable when you’re spending time with other people.
I was at a party yesterday. And three hours was enough to be outgoing and sociable. and I left because that was right for me, rather than staying on till the end and the after party sort of thing, which is what I might have done when I’m younger.
It’s also who am I? When we think about the way that we relate to people,
Do we want to be somebody who has deeper conversations rather than just talking about, you know, very peripheral stuff, Who really cares about what’s going on with celebrities, etcetera. But some people, that’s what they want to talk about and we can feel that we need to go on and talk about stuff like that, because that’s what interests other people.
But maybe if we start moving to a deeper conversation, other people will appreciate that.
Or maybe we need to find people who are more interested in these deeper conversations.
So, the question I set you at the beginning was, who am I?
I think it’s worth just making some notes around that one because to begin with you are going to start writing down things to do with your job and your relationships with other people.
But then you can be more thoughtful.
I am the sort of person who …
I’m just going to put it out there and leave it as a reflective exercise for you to consider.
And if you do this, and I really hope you do, I’d love you to, to get in touch and let me know, what you come up with. And I may well follow up with something that I think is, is relevant for you.
So, until next time, it’s Dr. Denise Taylor down at the wood. Take care. Bye-bye.